For Sean
I wanted tokiss the
bundles of stars
in your face
I wanted to
smooth the
rough edges of your
skin
weaved with mine
so full of
hidden pain
and
boyish innocence
I wanted to
melt into your
warm white walls
I didn't want to leave you
the heavens watched us
while we slept
in those cold
January nights
angels
full of
envy
above us
I suppose they
wanted you
to become
a fleeting blotch
of red
in my heart
I suppose
the whispers of
fate
decided to
change us
I didn't want to leave you
I always tasted the
sweetness
of your skin
as if for the last time
with gentle fingers
and sleepy eyes
we fell in love
I always tangled the
stars in your hair
I always kissed
the scars on your hands
as if I knew
we were going to
die
the angels have
you
now
the man I loved
and I have
sorrow
and
one million pictures of you
lodged in my chest
Perfect Even In Death
No one remembers,I cannot say why
Only thing I keep thinking
Is that nobody tried
You were mine, only mine
No one knew you like me
I don't know why He couldn't
Just let you be
We shared so much
In our short time together,
And the time that we shared
Has made memories forever
So much I learned,
So much I lost -
Everything turned, toppled
And tossed
Butterfly flutters, then turns
And kicks . . .
Then, that sad day . . .
Was my mind playing tricks?
No cry, no movement,
not even a Breath . . .
As you lay on my tummy -
Perfect even in death
When I think of you now
At the age you would be,
A beautiful "big boy"
Is the child I see
My son you were,
My son you'll always be
And One -
That is us;
You and Me
Remembrance
She remembers it all,All the people who had said
They cared, but did they really?
She remembers it all,
The sound of laughter and
How happy she'd been, but was she really?
She remembers it all,
His arms around her and
He said "I love you," but did he really?
She remembers it all,
The pain she'd felt when he left,
How her heart ached, but was it really?
She remembers it all,
The feeling of being so alone,
The feeling no one cared, but did they really?
But now they'll remember her,
Staring at the knife in her hand
How easy to slit her wrists, but will she really?
Silence, Emptiness, And Confusion
It feeds on loneliness and creates a void
Gray shadows haunt and torment and torture
A teenager is stricken and destroyed
There is no sound of laughter or happiness here
The little one has thrown in the towel today
Somber, melancholy moods decay the soul
It is futile to hope and dream and pray
Emptiness builds a home in this woman
In this girl, this child where hollows have bred
A deepening sea of nowhereness consumes
And eats away at every connecting thread
Confusion feeds like a savage inside her,
Leaving nothing considered worthy remains
Destined to walk through life less ordinary
Alone, exiled, different and disdained.
Gone So Soon
You took chancesOnce too many times.
As a child you thought -
"Oh no, never me."
Life is a gift,
Given and taken at some
Unknown time.
Your time came too soon -
Your life was over in a flash.
The fun you shared,
The joy you brought,
All just a memory -
Behind us.
And Yet I Die
I see the stars sparkling so bright,Within the moon kissed sky.
I hear the lark so sweetly sing,
Amidst the morning dawn.
I smell the flower full in bloom,
And see their royal pomp.
And yet some place so deep within,
I'm shrouded and I'm closed.
The brilliance there I can't see,
In mists of misery.
Enshrined inside, unable thus,
To touch the warmth without.
I gaze upon this passion spent,
And yet . . . Inside I die.
To all who died in the #GarissaAttack R.I.P
Losing
by Jade X. Phatonis losingall I can see.
nothing remains.
dripping slowly away
the tides recede
and I stand
alone.
I look down from the precipice
that is my life
and wonder where the tides go.
will they return to fill
my gaping soul?
or will the waters dry
to flow no more
and leave me standing
and breathless?
all I can do is
wait.
watching from my precipice,
all I can do is wonder.
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